Crows are wicked smart. I’ve watched them pick up nuts, fly, then drop them on the asphalt.
This wild crow, nicknamed 007, solved a crazy complicated puzzle the very first time he saw it.
Brilliant. It’s one thing for smart birds to show off after they’ve been trained for a lifetime to, I don’t know, sing Broadway tunes or tell dirty jokes. It’s another thing for a wild crow to pop in, spot some yummy food in the puzzle and do all this stuff using tools to get at it. I believe octopus (octupi?) can do similar stuff, like unscrewing jars and such, so it’s only a matter of time before the SyFy Channel comes up with CROWTOPUS EATS MANHATTAN and then CROWTOPUS VERSUS SHARKNADO.
007 the Crow, I salute you.
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The shocking video of a giant flipping golden eagle, soaring in like some kind of pterodactyl, which I can’t even spell, to snatch a toddler — well, that thing may or may not be a total fake.
Watch it and decide.
Not fake is this long nature video of a golden eagle killing and eating MOUNTAIN GOATS.
I am not making that up. Why bother hunting rats, rabbits, purse dogs belonging to Paris Hilton, wolves, tiny humans and anything else under 33 pounds — why even mess with such trifling things when you can take out giant goats, and do so using jedi bird mastery of gravity?
We should remember three things: (1) birds are feathered dinosaurs, (2) golden eagles are like mini velicoraptors WHO CAN FLY and (3) if you have one as a pet, I am not cleaning the bird cage.
Bonus video: a rundown, with all kinds of scientific numbers and such about the golden eagle, truly the honey badger of birds. (Though in a fight, I’m putting a purple euro on the honey badger.)
You might ask why we’re having so many forest fires lately. I think maybe because it’s 98 degrees in October and hasn’t rained in forever. But I keep hearing that global warming is some kind of communist myth, invented by Lenin and still perpetuated by him (he and Elvis are living in Manhattan, growing their sideburns and wearing black berets). So I must be wrong. Rush Limbaugh says forest fires are caused by God sending a lightning bolt down on some trees whenever an uppity woman earns her master’s degree from some pinko-commie university. OK, I AM KIDDING WITH THE POLITICS, though the ice sheet in western Antarctica is melting and our grandkids will be living in Kevin Costner’s WATERWORLD.
Also: here’s related video of firefighter peoples in Florida using not just ping pong balls and helicopters, but also airboats, aeroplanes and paintball guns.
Guy Bergstrom. Photo by Suhyoon Cho.
Reformed journalist. Scribbler of speeches and whatnot. Wrote a thriller that won some award (PNWA 2013). Represented by Jill Marr of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency.