So this is an actual sport, and yes, that’s Vladimir Putin’s daughter dancing like it’s 1985.
Back in 1980’s, competitive aerobics was a big thing for about two seconds right when when Sylvester Stallone (5’10”) pretended he could beat up Swedish studmuffin Dolph Lundgren (6’5) in a big U.S.vs. Russia stand-in for the Cold War.
In 1987, Crystal Light had national championships in team aerobic dancing, and folks on the interwebs make fun of it today. I probably have shown people clips from back then. Yet this new Russian video made me take a second look. You should, too.
See? The American version, sure, we can say it’s seems silly now, but those men and women actually could dance and did hard physical stuff that was entertaining. They didn’t repeat themselves over and over like Putin’s daughter kicking sideways before doing the whole Throw the Cheerleader in the Air and Catch Her trick seventeen times. Difficult? Yeah. Impressive? Maybe twice.
So in the battle of Cheesy Aerobic Dance Sports Similar to Ice Skating in that Only Judges Can Know Who Wins, you have to give this round to the Americans. (Yes, ice skating is not a sport, even though it is hard. Neither is bodybuilding, even though it is hard, too. The more audiences are clueless about who wins until judges reveal the answer, the more it’s like a reality show where producers are pulling all the strings and you get scandals were judges are bribed to pick the right winners.)
What’s the verdict with U.S. vs. Russia competitive aerobics? We did it first and we did it better, even if Russia’s president has his daughter involved or not.*
What other strange sport-like objects deserve scrutiny? Hit me in the comments or the Twitter.
*Maybe if he showed up at halftime, shirtless and riding a tiger, the score would be closer.
Note: updated post after putting up wrong second video.
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Guy Bergstrom. Photo by Suhyoon Cho.
Reformed journalist. Scribbler of speeches and whatnot. Wrote a thriller that won some award and is represented by Jill Marr of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency.