Category Archives: Gear, guns and such

Everybody panic: expert says Yellowstone Supervolcano could ‘destroy the United States’

So people are freaking out because (a) the Yellowstone supervolcano blows up every 600,000 years, (b) it would turn North America into a sea of ash and create a mini Ice Age, (c) the magma pit under the supervolcano is causing earthquakes and bulging and  (d) there’s a viral video of bison running along a highway, supposedly fleeing the coming explosion.

Well, grab your bug-out bag and run for the hills.

Except it might not happen for another 100,000 years. So there’s that.

This video lends weight to survivalist types pointing at the stockpile of canned food and ammo in the basement and saying, “See? It was all worth it. Throw the tent in the pickup and let’s head to the Yukon.” Continue reading

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Filed under 1 Survival Sunday, Gear, guns and such, Zombie apocalypse

Joss Whedon + politics + zombie apocalypse = EPIC WIN

Joss the Whedon, I am impressed by your funny and interesting zombie apocalypse shebang.

I salute you, and would happily save a space for you on the armored school bus with a 20mm anti-aircraft gun.

Related posts:

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This is Guy Bergstrom the writer, not the Guy Bergstrom in Stockholm or the guy in Minnesota who sells real estate or whatever. Separate guys. Kthxbai.

Guy Bergstrom. Photo by Suhyoon Cho.

Reformed journalist. Scribbler of speeches and whatnot. Wrote a thriller that won some award (PNWA 2013). Represented by Jill Marr of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency.

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Filed under 1 Survival Sunday, Gear, guns and such, Zombie apocalypse

Why doomsday preppers are DOING IT WRONG

There’s a big trend on the Glowing Tube of not just (a) reality shows, but (b) reality shows involving extreme people. And it doesn’t get  more extreme than people devoting all their time and monies to preparing for the apocalypse.

This is fun stuff that actually poses interesting questions. It also lets us watch people prepare for doomsday by shooting their thumb off.

Some questions:

1) Are you ready for doomsday?

2) What version of the apocalypse is your favorite?

  • Zombie infestation
  • Mad Max nuclear wasteland
  • Global economic collapse
  • Invasion of the Snooki clones

3) Are the doomsday preppers (a) admirable, self-reliant people with useful doomsday skills or (b) whackadoodles spending insane amounts of money on bomb shelters that will never get used?

Continue reading

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Filed under 1 Survival Sunday, Gear, guns and such, Zombie apocalypse

How to survive the coming Robopocalypse

Zombies, nuclear war and the Spanish Flu wiping out civilization are all fun to talk about. Mad Max! Bartertown!

But a robot uprising is a real possibility. Maybe they get smarter than us and don’t like being slaves to inferior beings.

Maybe an evil genius creates an unstoppable army of robots.

Or maybe some programmer screws up the C++ whatever and turns happy little lawn-mowing robots into roving blades of robotic death.

Either way, this Daniel H. Wilson man (do NOT forget the H., peoples) is not only a robot expert with a PhD and such, but an author who’s written about surviving the coming robopocalypse. Also: the animation to the video is awesomesauce.

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This is Guy Bergstrom the writer, not the Guy Bergstrom in Stockholm or the guy in Minnesota who sells real estate or whatever. Separate guys. Kthxbai.

Guy Bergstrom. Photo by Suhyoon Cho.

Reformed journalist. Scribbler of speeches and whatnot. Wrote a thriller that won some award (PNWA 2013). Represented by Jill Marr of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency.

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Filed under 1 Survival Sunday, Gear, guns and such, Zombie apocalypse

Post-apocalyptic driving and kabooming

If there is a zombie apocalypse / alien invasion / nuclear war, you’ll be running around all Mad Max-style, right?

That means the Bad Guys will also be cruising the interstates, unless you really believe they’ll be walking around or riding bicycles.

So real survivalist prepper types need to think about (a) the best way to armor up their Subaru, (b) where they can possibly fill up after the apocalypse and (c) the best ways to blow up enemy Subaru’s who may be in after your stash of petro / teriyaki beef jerky / bullets / DVD collection of all 4.92 bazillion episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

How can you blow up a car, especially an armored car?

In the movies, cars just go boom when you shoot them in the gas tank. This is nonsense, as anybody who’s watched Mythbusters or shot up a car would know.

The good British people at Top Gear took this all the way and experimented in the most awesome way possible: automobile skeet shooting.

That’s right. We’re talking about yelling “pull” and blowing away a car that’s flying through the air.

This is seven separate kinds of awesome.

Top Gear  should receive tax subsidies from the U.S., paid for by levying a tax on 90 percent of the stupid reality shows being created by Hollywood, and that way, we’d get less Snooki and more of this sort of thing.

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This is Guy Bergstrom the writer, not the Guy Bergstrom in Stockholm or the guy in Minnesota who sells real estate or whatever. Separate guys. Kthxbai.

Guy Bergstrom. Photo by Suhyoon Cho.

Reformed journalist. Scribbler of speeches and whatnot. Wrote a thriller that won some award (PNWA 2013). Represented by Jill Marr of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency.

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Filed under 1 Survival Sunday, Gear, guns and such, Zombie apocalypse

Survival Sunday: Concrete Canvas Shelters of the Apocalypse

The First Rule of the Zombie Apocalypse: You will NOT be staying in your home.

There’ll be no electricity, no water, no cable, no internets and no guarantee that your house is remotely zombie-proof.

The Second Rule of the Zombie Apocalypse: Find a defensible shelter.

Sleeping under the stars is a good way to get nom-nom-nommed. Even if there are not walking dead around to eat your brains, other survivors will happily steal your stuff and leave you for dead.

Here’s a great little shelter from the British, who have glorious accents, making anything they say or invent ten times the awesome.

It’s an inflatable shelter made from canvas impregnated with cement*. Blow it up, spray water on it and bam, instant bomb shelter.

This is military grade stuff. Pile dirt around it and you’ve got an instant bunker that’s safe from small arms fire, mortars and the undead.

*Yes, the video says “concrete.” Cement is actually the right term. Concrete is cement mixed with rocks and whatnot.

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This is Guy Bergstrom the writer, not the Guy Bergstrom in Stockholm or the guy in Minnesota who sells real estate or whatever. Separate guys. Kthxbai.

Guy Bergstrom. Photo by Suhyoon Cho.

Reformed journalist. Scribbler of speeches and whatnot. Wrote a thriller that won some award (PNWA 2013). Represented by Jill Marr of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency.

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Filed under 1 Survival Sunday, Gear, guns and such, Zombie apocalypse